What if I do not want my husband to know I have consulted a lawyer?

by Heather Hostetter

You should think about where you call the lawyer’s office from – a landline instead of a cellphone would be best as there is no calling detail for landline calls on your monthly bills.  Do not do an Internet search for the law firm or lawyer you are thinking of calling on your home computer or cell phone.  Use your work computer or a friend’s computer or the computer at the public library. Do not pay for the consultation with a check drawn on a joint checking account or with a credit card that your husband has access to. Pay in cash or have a friend or parent who will call in with their credit card to pay the consult for you.  Your attorney might give you some written information at the consultation.  Think about where you can store this information after the consultation where your husband will not find it.  Keep it at work or at a friend’s house or in your car.  Do not feel badly about being secretive. You have the right to get information in a private setting so you can collect your thoughts and process your feelings without having to manage your spouse’s thoughts and feelings at the same time.


Q: What is Collaborative Divorce?
A: Collaborative Divorce is a process for separating or divorcing parties to justly and equitably resolve their differences that avoids the necessity of going to court.

Q: How do I get started?
A: Select an attorney from the list of participating and trained attorneys. She or he will discuss...

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